Wednesday, May 05, 2010

Hither, Thither and Slither


View of Murano,

Antonio Canaletto (1697-1768)

oil on canvas.

Murano, the island of glass.


Writerly Tips:

See Sean Ferrell's beautiful essay, On falling in love again, for the first time, about not deleting ooparts (out-of-place artifacts) you may find in revision of your MS.

And Nathan Bransford's post yesterday on the value of a Series Bible. No need to make your brown eyes blue.


Hitting a Nerve:

I am pleased to report improvement -- in spite of Saturday's MRI from Hell. Suitably drugged up, yesterday I managed to walk to the corner store and back, a total distance of about two blocks.

Walk is, of course, a gross exaggeration, I shuffled and drunk-lurched and probably attracted a few disapproving stares. ( Has Widow Harris been hitting the bottle? I never would have thought! And at this time of day? Disgusting!)

The need for pain-killers has also marginally improved. I will be glad to get my mind back.


A Comparison Some May Find Offensive:

Recently I've wondered if landing a book contract may be compared to graduating from high school and entering college: new scene, new friends, new standards...


The Last Corny Joke:

A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license.
First, of course, he had to take an eye test.
The bored optician showed him a card with the letters

C Z W I Z N O S T A C Z

"Can you read this?" he inquired.
"Read it?" the Pole replied. "I know the guy!"

35 comments:

Carla said...

Not the last corny joke, surely :-)

Glad to hear you are getting better, and I hope the improvement continues.

fairyhedgehog said...

I'm glad you're feeling a bit better, although not enough yet by the sound of it.

I hope you'll keep up with your old friends while you're making new ones.

writtenwyrdd said...

Love the joke, hate the health problems you are having. :( But despite the pain, for many issues, working through it makes it better. I doubt that's the case with sciatica, but it worked for my abysmally arthritic, fractured back.

As far as a Series Bible goes, I always do that. Any ideas, words /specific details from the book AND the real world (citing the thought processes where applicable), character names (with descriptions and background info as I come up with it (generally just Ctl+C and drop the exact text into place). Because I have a mind made of cheesecloth and cannot retain the stuff for five seconds.

And I refer back to it constantly.

Scott from Oregon said...

I have, after being dropped by a girl rock climbing twenty years ago, problems with my sacrum.

I call it, much to the chagrine of my chiropractor "sacroiliacalitus"...

It makes me walk crooked down th street too when it acts up, and when it really acts up, it makes it hard to think...



Hope your back gets fixed so your brain works properly.

Bernita said...

Thank you, Carla.
Yes, unless my friend sends me more.
I wonder over how everyone has borne them so bravely!

Fairy, thank you.
I hope you'll keep up with your old friends while you're making new ones.
It is my intention!I am not fickle by nature.

Written, I've always believed that working though is best and have been frustrated that it didn't seem to work this time. Perhaps what stage is a factor. Certainly, I don't seem to be paying today for yesterday's jaunt.

Yes. Such notes are vital, especially for pansters, for consistency and backstory in the next book- and sometimes, for the first.

laughingwolf said...

lol... love that joke :)

good you're getting better, if all too slowly

widder harris needs must stop imbibing in the middle of the day, late afternoon is soon enough ;)

Bernita said...

Thank you, Scott.
We resemble Quasimodo looking for a bell tower.
You understand the condition perfectly!

Charles Gramlich said...

glad you are feeling a bit better. Hope the balance improves soon. I have a series bible for the Talera books for sure.

Bernita said...

widder harris needs must stop imbibing in the middle of the day, late afternoon is soon enough ;)
~snicker, hoot~
LW, I do love you!

Bernita said...

Charles, thank you.
I know you must have, because nothing jolted me in the Talera books.

writtenwyrdd said...

If sciatica is inflammatory or a result of pressure, I'd think activity might irritate it more; but no mobility might make ti worse? If your doc is anything like mine, you get sent home with a handout prescribing exercises you can do yourself.

sex scenes at starbucks said...

I think Widow Harris should be your pseudonym.

I do hope this is the beginning of the end for you and sciatica! He was never good enough for you, Bernita...

starvingwritenow said...

"Widow Harris is hitting the bottle..." LOL!! I had such an image!!

Seriously though, I am glad to read that you are vertical again, at least in short, lurching spurts. I put up seven rows of siding on my garage this morning and I think my back might take it's revenge tomorrow. Joy!

raine said...

Am SO glad to hear the sciatica is a bit better. The drugs are awful, but the pain is worse. :(
(Am also well acquainted with the Quasimodo lurch & peg-leg shuffle--ugh).

Recently I've wondered if landing a book contract may be compared to graduating from high school and entering college

Yes.

Bernita said...

I assured her I would "try some at home " from the net, Written. But,at its worst, I couldn't.

I had a perfectly lovely pseudonym picked out - then decided there was no point, Betsy!

He was never good enough for you, Bernita...
~snort, snicker~

It's a small town, SWN.
Thank you. Hope you didn't overdo.

Yes, you know exactly. And it makes one feel old and decrepit, Raine. Last year I was climbing ladders, painting window sashes, trimming trees... this year I creep about.

BernardL said...

Be careful you don't take a header, Bernita. Good joke!

Bernita said...

Bernard, you are so right. This has screwed my balance and posture. I have to be extra careful on stairs.

Whirlochre said...

Sorry you're quasimodonic
but your wit is alive, a tonic.
Long may your Pole jokes
flag up the phonic
and word of your exploits
be thrillingly sonic.

Bernita said...

Whirl, thank you. That's charming!
(I haven't had a poem written to me for at least five years!)

Roland D. Yeomans said...

It is wonderful news that you are getting better. Hang in there. You have friends in blogville, Roland

writtenwyrdd said...

Oh, you want POETRY, do you? Well:

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Bernita's a sweetie
and...Bernita's still a sweetie.

Hope you had another excellent jaunt today, drunken lurching or no.

word veri: dauntingly, it's 'pliers'

Bernita said...

Roland, thank you! I appreciate that so much.
My blogville friends have helped me through some very hard times.

~chokes and laughs~
Written,you are the sweetie!

Indeed I did! I lurched - the zombie appreciation crew would have liked my performance art - down to my doctor's office ( had to take a taxi back, but so what!)

Steve Malley said...

I'm not sure which made me laugh more... 'the Widow Harris hitting the bottle' or that joke. Loved 'em both!

laughingwolf said...

me too, bernita :D

Bernita said...

Thank you, Steve.
I suppose the reason these jokes are old and corny is because they are good ones and so survive.

Isn't it amazing, Tony? The degree of real affection one can have for people one will probably never meet?
I am grateful for my friends.

laughingwolf said...

indeed it is, bernita... but - i'll be driving to see my bil in st.catharines at some point, maybe by late summer - so there's a chance of having coffee with you?

dunno for sure as yet, will let you know... perhaps my younger daughter will come along, but kenny for sure ;) lol

Natasha Fondren said...

Ouch! But that does sound like improvement. I hope it heals very, very soon, Bernita!

Bernita said...

Tony, that would be lovely..You'd drive right past my town. Let me know when it's solid!

Natasha, thank you.
There's definite improvement - but, damn, it's slow.

laughingwolf said...

will do for sure :)

Travis Erwin said...

Feel free to add new friends but please don't ditch us old ones.

jason evans said...

Just thinking about that nervy pain makes me cringe. Glad you're feeling better! (And lucid!!)

Bernita said...

Travis, how could I? I owe you.
You all are responsible for helping me stick with it - I was very close to chucking everything last year. You've all commented and critiqued and encouraged.
Shortly, I may not be able to make the rounds to your blogs as often (I used to every single day)because I'm beginning to realize what a big time sink ( big because it's so new to me) pubbing and promotion is.

Jason, you be careful running up and down that mountain, hmmm?
Well, not entirely lucid, but the mists are beginning to part!

laughingwolf said...

become a fan, i am:

http://rolandyeomans.blogspot.com/

wv: equippr

Lana Gramlich said...

MRI? I didn't catch that in a post before...Have you gotten the results? I hope you have a treatable cause for all of your trouble, anyway!

Bernita said...

A lot there to enjoy, LW.

Thank you, Lana. No results for another week, but it seems to be improving - quite vastly in comparison to the way I was a few weeks ago!