Saturday, November 05, 2005

The Writer Is A Teen-Age Girl

Remember when girls waited by the phone, loitered in high school halls, on bleachers, in the corners at the Dance?
Waiting, with giggling, artful nonchalance for The Guys to notice them, ask them for a date, for a dance?
Sometimes unpublished writers are like that.
Waiting to be noticed, watching with envy, awe or admiration while the twitchy-assed, cute little number with the perky boobs waltzes past clinched with that hunky guy with the die-for-grin.
It is little use to stand around like a gawky teen-age girl with glasses, fantasizing that your Dream Guy ( agent/editor) will notice your beautiful soul (your novel) under your frumpy clothes and ask you to take a drive in his red sports car ( a contract).
Queries are the short skirt, the poured -in jeans and flirty top - clevage, baby- the contact lenses, the new hair style, the mascara and make-up that do the job.
You have to get noticed first - even if your sights aren't set on BMOC, even if you really like the guy with the pick-up truck and the pocket protector who's been mooning since seventh grade about that society bitch from across town.
Now, if I could just figure out how to write one without sounding like every other slut on the street...

"I'm sending you this query -
I hope you like it lots,
It's a complete and finished story
About lust and blood and guts...."

The sound you hear is ...

10 comments:

Ric said...

Absolutely Fabulous!

Great analogy!

First you have to get their attention. nicely put.

Robyn said...

Oh, but I've been that girl. It was painful. Now I have to go through it again at 41. Ugh.

James Goodman said...

That is such a great analogy. It's kind of funny, but I used a similar analogy to describe the process to my wife. great minds and all that...

jason evans said...

Just be yourself. Then, the right guy, rather than the beautiful jerk, will ask you out.

--Jason Evans Harris

AE Rought said...

"Twitchy-assed" Oh *sigh* someone who thinks like me!

Bernita you have a gift with words. I would think that a synopsis wouldn't be difficult at all for you. I want to read your story already. :)

Bernita said...

Thank you, Ae, for stopping by and leaving a kind message. Synopsis block is sometimes not so much "what?" but "which?"
Jason, I am touched and gratified.
You are right.
Odd, isn't it Goody?... this subconscious meme at work.It's happened to me several times lately too, and thank you.
Robyn, we're all "that girl" at some time or another, but you have an orginal flair and vision.
Ric,thank you, you remember the images better than most I imagine.

Mark Pettus said...

Bernita, you are remarkable.

By the way, the gawky girl with the frumpy clothes is usually the best kisser in the whole school. She isn't the first girl to get invited to the dance, but the fella who finally asks her is gonna be awfully damned glad he did.

Bernita said...

Everybody...read Mark's blog!
He is engaging in what psychologists call transference - applying to others the very quality he himself possesses.

Dennie McDonald said...

This is so perfect!

I couldn't have come up with a better analogy!

Bernita said...

Thank you, Dennie, and thank you for stopping by.